Paranoia

Earlier, I was feeling good for waking up early, 7am (Yes, that's a bit early for me). I became my mom's driver to the market and waited for them to be done. While waiting on the car, I read the Murakami book I bought and as I was reading it I noticed that the weather was rather good despite weather forecast saying it's going to rain. It was perfect, the sun shining on the book's pages, leaves falling off the trees, cool wind blowing and it was a sunday morning so people walking are in their not-so-hurried selves. I loved the view.

Then, I panicked after loving everything. I suddenly got this thought of someone barging into the car and shooting me point blank. I don't know why I'm ruining everything, but I tried thinking what to do in case that happens. Where do I duck in? What my mother will do, what my funeral will be.

Good thing, my mother came in just in time and every thought just went away. I guess, I haven't gotten over my past demons. This is something I think i should do something about.

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